As a lifelong crossdresser, it has been a complicated journey ..
Like so many others like me, I've had to balance my need for stability and the needs of others with the never ending feeling that there is more to me than the man I have been presenting to the outside world.
Sure I get to dress up every once in a while, sit around the house looking pretty, maybe even go out to a club occasionally. Little moments, that let the girl in me express herself.
Those moments are special, but there has always been this nagging feeling that there must be more. Even though I can, at those times, feel and present myself as a girl, just looking like a girl just doesn't seem to be enough anymore.
I need to BE a girl.